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I must reproduce this, for sheer amusement. The following was posted to the Digger Forum
over at Graphic Smash, by one Jules:

NOTE: This has not been play-tested!

Nor am I willing to play-test it!

Nor have I really read through it carefully!

Nor am I really even a huge D20 system fan!

*+2 strength (biceps with feet!), +1 intelligence (smarter than yer hack'n'slashing half-orc barbarian), -2 charisma, -1 dexterity (claws pose a bit of a disadvantage there)
Small: As a Small creature, a wombat gains a +1 size bonus to Armor Class, a +1 size bonus on attack rolls, and a +4 size bonus on Hide checks, but she uses smaller weapons than humans use, and her lifting and carrying limits are three-quarters of those of a Medium character.
*Wombat base land speed is 20 feet
*Low-Light Vision: A wombat can see twice as far as a human in starlight, moonlight, torchlight, and similar conditions of poor illumination. She retains the ability to distinguish color and detail under these conditions.
*Automatic Languages: Common and Terran. Bonus Languages: Undercommon, Dwarven, Gnome, Gnoll, Celestial
*+4 racial bonus on saving throws against fear, charm, and illusion-based spells (Hmm... They didn't cut the gems that massive dragon has in its hoard as well as they might have. Hey, where did everyone just go?).
*Special charisma modifier: In normal circumstances, wombats' tend to let their plain speech and rough ways give them a bad impression, giving them their standard -2 charisma penalty. However, in non-verbal aspects, they are quite charismatic, being very cute: as such, if prevented from speaking, but somehow called upon to make a Charisma check, they actually have a +2 bonus relative to their default modifier. (for example, if a naïve human NPC comes across a prone, unconscious wombat, he'll think it's very cute (high charisma); once he treats the wombat and it regains consciousness, and starts saying things like "you cast a magical SPELL to heal me? Well no wonder the wound isn't healed proper!" the wombat's charisma drops back down to its default modifier.
*+2 racial bonus to Craft, Appraise, Profession, Knowledge (architecture and engineering), and Knowledge (Dungeoneering)
*AC counts as +3 if attacked from behind, due to armored rump.
*Special restriction: atheism. Wombats can never worship any deities. They aren't, strictly speaking, atheist, in that they believe gods exist. They do believe, though, that they're essentially always more trouble than they're worth.
*Special restriction: anti-magical. Wombats cannot wield magical weapons, nor can they use magic. Strictly speaking, all classes are permitted to them, but I wouldn't recommend playing a Wombat sorcerer. However, wombats have access to considerably greater technologies than most races, and this partially makes up for their lack of magic (for example, they can't cast "light" spells, but they can break out a glowstick). However, these can only be crafted by the wombat itself or bought in a wombat warren. (a special "advanced wombat equipment" list is needed now, I suppose.) Give a wombat a priceless Vorpal Sword, and your wombat's first response is to try to pawn it off to the nearest unsuspecting adventurer ASAP.
*They get five free feats: Diligent, Lightning Reflexes, Endurance, and Martial Weapon Proficiency: picks, and unarmed strike (as with monks, owing to claws)

Next up--Wombat: The Tunnelling!

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Average roll on 1d2 is 1.5; average roll on 1d4 is 2.5; average roll on 1d2+1, which is what a base Wombat gets, is also 2.5. Compare this to the 2.0 average on 1d3, and you'll find that even without a special attack, only a half-orc beats a wombat at fisticuffs.

... good point.

And that's pretty damn impressive all by itself, when you consider that the wombat is punching the half-orc in the SHIN.

Don't say funny things while I'm drinking soda. Now my sinuses are carbonated.

Natural weapons, by the way, give little advantage over monk attacks, and barring house rules, monks don't get any sort of damage bonus if they're using a natural weapon—it's a trade-off, instinct vs. training.

Oh, you're right. I had misremembered the 'monk damage by size category' table in Sword and Fist as 'monk damage by natural unarmed damage' table. I think both would be useful, actually, because....

It makes sense if you consider that a monk foregoes the use of individual body parts in favor of the ENTIRE body becoming a weapon, attacking with whatever part's handy rather than just with the pointy bits (and STILL doing better damage than he would normally do with the pointy bits!).

... because I agree with your premise here, but not your conclusion -- most martial arts are pragmatic enough that a student who had some kind of special weapon built in would not be instructed to, in effect, neglect it. Most of the martial arts I'm familiar with tend to put heavy emphasis, in their training (as distinguished from the art itself), on hurting the other guy as much possible as quickly as possible, rather than on philosophy or spirituality, though, so I'm working from a skewed sample -- and d20 monks are definitely more the philosophy-or-spirituality type.

And there's the matter of qualification, I guess. You'd really need more specialized training than your average monastery can give you to make effective use of your rump in a martial arts context. Bloody hell, I think I feel a prestige class coming on.

</i>1d3 doesn't seem so bad, when it's 1d3+9.</i>

Dude, it's hard to make 1dANYTHING+9 look bad.

only Wholeness of Body, Abundant Step, Quivering Palm, and Empty Body are affected by Casting Ineptitude... and flavorwise, that's perfect: a wombat wouldn't want to use any of those anyway. Note that Ki Strike doesn't have an effect based on character level, it has different discrete effects at different character levels: it's really a progression of several non-level-dependent abilities.

Right again. I hadn't thought that through completely.

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