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Home! Alive! Great con! All animals accounted for, will inspect garden tomorrow. (Anticipating at least one deceased tomato.) 

I flopped down on the bed and Ben immediately stomped onto my chest and informed me that he has not been petted for days and this is a completely unacceptable development. Steps must be taken. After several minutes of contrition, he has allowed me to live.

Meanwhile, Brandon the border collie believes that the only reason Kevin would sit down is to pet him--they've been parted so long!--and nearly climbed into Kevin's lap. While he was on the toilet. (All I heard was "Buddy, no. No. Do you mind? I'm trying to--no. Down. Can I have a little...oh, never mind...Yes, I missed you, too.")

Full con report later. I go die now.

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I would say "welcome home," or something along those lines, but the animals appear to have already accomplished that task ... with great zeal.

So, instead: May your tomatoes always outnumber your hornworms.

Edited at 2012-06-19 05:20 am (UTC)

One of our cats tries to sit on our laps while we're on the toilet. Totally not the same as a collie, but still. I understand. If Luna can't get to the lap, she'll settle for sitting between the legs and putting her front paws on the knees and merping until the pettings happen.

My cat Stacey always gets on my lap when I'm on the toilet; she also likes to jump up on my shoulders when I come home.

My golden retriever Tipper was a 75-lb. lap dog, so yes, I totally understand.

My cat Spot does the strop-the-legs-like-a-windshield-wiper thing while I'm busy at toilet duty when I've been gone, oh, more than two hours at a time. After all, I'm a captive audience, right? If she didn't take advantage of me in some form they'd take away her Kitty Union card.

The ferrets, on the other hand, generally settle for at least one of them accomplishing the 'Look, I'mma Turn Your Underwear Into A Hammock' position at times like this. The really sad thing is that they look so cute while on their backs with their little paws all curled up and their faces staring *right* at you expectantly that they totally win, always. Always.

Of course the ferret wins.

No, the userpic isn't either of the cats in question.

We had a cat that would do the panty-hammock thing when I was on the toilet. Even though he passed away several years ago, his legacy lives on with our newest kitten.

How can one kick the little buggers out when one isn't doing anything with one's clothes while "visiting the library"?

The only problem I have with the animals in the underwear is the thought of where their fur is going to end up...


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Edited at 2012-06-19 08:29 am (UTC)

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I used to catsit for a faucet-drinker! He was pretty funny, he would prowl around until you went in the bathroom and then either get in the tub or the sink and stare until it was turned on. His owners ended up just getting him a small aquarium and leaving the pump on so he could always have running water. Apparently he didn't like the cat fountains or something? Picky, picky~

My Rose is just like Buddy, except we were only parted for about three minutes before she tried joining me on the throne.

Having a toddler means never closing the bathroom door.

our cat Paddington (aka Paddy, or more commonly The Padded One) loves to buffalo her way into the bathroom when you're on the toilet and indisposed, then demanding you give her a good solid back scratching RIGHT NOW! Then she goes over and twangs the spring loaded doorstop thing, which is really LOUD in the bathroom, being that it's 98% tile and other assorted reflective surfaces. Upon hearing the "SPROING!!!!" sound, laughter usually ensues from the bedroom next door to the bathroom. Hilarity all about.

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