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breeden
ursulav

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18050. Think I may be channeling a bargain basement Eva Ibbotson.

And hopefully the flooring is in back home by now. And the flooring guy has left, so that I can survey the damage. WHY must they park on the flower beds? Seriously, it's not like there isn't tons of room there. Nobody has to drive halfway up to the woodpile and take down the shrubs on the way.

I'm picking up some of those little wrought iron fencelets on the way home. Maybe if there's something man-made there, they won't think "Oh, clearly this is just some part of the world that hasn't been paved yet."

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I think you need something spikey - something that will damage their freaking paint job and flatten their tires.

I was going to say, if the fence doesn't work, sprinkle some caltrops in the flower bed.

Can you imagine having to walk through or kneel in the flowerbed later to do maintenance? Ouch!

I was considering a sign - "Beware of Caltrops".

Not actually using them, just the sign.

The only problem is, you'd need a contractor who knows what a caltrop is.

Cultural literacy is so important.

There's more than a few who are ex-military. Or who wish they were.

I thought they already had sweet gum balls in their yard...

(Deleted comment)
Fake? Where's the fun in that?

Nobody looks good in prison-orange jumpsuits. And not looking good is not fun.

I know, right? When I had my kitchen redone, the ONLY place they would set up their tile saw (and dump their excess concrete run off) was IN the flower bed. The rest of the yard was a dirt field, but they went out of their way to take out the flowers.

It may be something in the contractor handbook... like a secret handshake or something.

When we had the AC unit installed, they destroyed the entire flowerbed-- and this was after we carefully cleared out the designated area (to save the plants we wanted to keep) by the air vent. I assume it's like playing the Legend of Zelda, one can't leave a pot unbroken; too inviting are those pristine flowerbeds.

Also! Squash kachina!

Bill them for the repair costs. It's probably the only thing they'll notice.

In most cases (NB: IANAL) it's a requirement of the contract that they clean up the worksite after themselves and leave it as close to its initial condition as possible.

A nice set of those tire shredders they put in parking lots... yeah!

I had a ditch that kept cars away, so when winter came the idiots ran their snowmobiles all over my yard. I wish the world was MY damn oyster. Damnit.

My dad put in two nice little paved areas between the curb and the sidewalk and put in tall sprinklers in the dirt because they're more effective than ground level ones. People went out of their way to park BETWEEN the two walkways and use their car doors to smash off the tall sprinklers. He contemplated putting in a piece of rebar to protect the sprinkler heads but for some reason never did. I wish he had.

Poor shrubberies. :-( Good luck with the parking problem.

Hope the writing (wow!) and the floors come out just the way you wanted!

This looks like the place for another metal chicken. Spiky! Dangerous! Brightly colored mating plumage that says hey baby I will *%^& up your car so bad it will have anthropomorphic motorized offspring!

<3

That made me snicker and then get a vivid mental image, and then snicker some more.

have you seen this?

(Anonymous)
http://kafkaskoffee.com/wp/?webcomic_post=rutabaga-begins

It's a webcomic named Rutabaga about an 'adventure chef'.

Thought you might find it quirky/funny.

Big white rocks. They look so pretty lining the yard.

See, you should have bought the velociraptor/ flamingo herd. They would have taken out that truck, no problem.


I think it's a subconscious effort to park out of the way, actually. Our entire yard had to be dug up to find a leaking pipe, and since it's a working farm no one in their right mind is going to park on anything that looks remotely paved--because the next piece of equipment that wants to drive through Might Be Bigger. But a flower garden? Obviously no one is going to drive through that.

A friend of mine's father owns a janitorial service. The worst mess, by far, they have to clean up is when someone doesn't immediately chase out the construction/refurbishing contractors the instant they finish working. If they are left alone for a moment they will not only destroy what they put in but mess up anything else they can get to. Why? Hostility? Jealousy? As in 'I lead a crappy life and it's your fault!" Dunno. But yeah, they love to destroy healthy and pretty plants too. Like gardeners who seem to go out of their way to blow dust and leaves all over any available car.

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