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Curse You, Brain!

So I decided I need to make a resin head for this thing, and I’m gonna start by making a sporran, because the stole involves too much material and I want a dry run first with the head design.

And then I was like “I need to sit down and sculpt a head!”

And my brain went “Nope. Don’t think so.”

“But you have to,” I said. “I can’t do this without you, brain.”

“Nope,” said brain. “Not today. Not feeling it.”

“Screw you!” I cried. “I am a REAL ARTIST! That means I power through this crap and don’t get hung up on muses and inspiration and “not feeling it!”

“Yeah, good luck with that,” said the brain, picking up a copy of Craniums Quarterly.

“But I’m a professional! I came to work! I will sit in front of this thing until I make good art!”

“Go ahead, if you don’t mind making total crap and then curling into fetal position,” said brain, thumbing through its magazine. “I’d get the potato chips now, though. You’ll need them later when the weeping passes.”

“You’re my brain!” I shouted, mad with power. “You have to do as I say!”

The brain gave me a long, level look over the top of the magazine. The articles had headlines like Making the Most of Your Ganglia and 37 Secrets the Cortex Loves (But Will Never Tell You!)

“You sure that’s how you want to play it?” it said. “You do know I control the motor functions.”



“Stop hitting yourself…” said brain, turning the page.

“I’m trying!”

And that is why I am not getting art done today.

Originally published at Tea with the Squash God. You can comment here or there.

I will go to any writing/creative workshop you lead. Just please, promise not to hit me with a rolled up magazine.

... Now I want a sporran in the shape of Great Plushthanga's head.

Whatever fits of crafting madness result because of this are your fault. I hope you're happy with yourself

well, that was art in an of itself!

I swear to god, this is my EXACT problem today. The bruises can attest to it fairly well.

And now you know why the rest of us envy you so. Your normal mode is so freakin amazing.

Your brain is so adult. When my brain goes on strike, it pulls its hoodie down over its face and goes "Shan't. Can't. Won't" and complains about how shitty the world is.

Oh my dog we're sharing the same brain!!! That is amazing. And it explains so much too. Sigh

Urgh, I know that feeling. That's usually when a lot of my laundry and/or dishes get done.

Huh, brains. Maybe you should mention that there seem to be a lot of zombies around these days, and that you need to make art to pay for the shotgun and electrified fence.

(Deleted comment)
This was too true.

Much love Ursula!

...waiting for pictures.
...waiting for pictures.
...waiting for pictures.

And being as how I have been working at Highland Games for the last 3 months...
I Wanna See That Sporran!!!

Maybe your brain just needs a little ... misdirection?

Y'see, when I was reading that you were putting a resin head on a stole, I immediately thought about the things you could do with a heavy weight on the end of a long string and realized what an awesome weapon this would be! Someone tries to mug you? Whip off the stole and bean 'em one! Rabid attack dog? Three whips around your head and let loose the flogs of war!

I think your brain could do something with that, don'tcha think?

Oh, my. I want to borrow your "Let loose the flogs of war" to name a thing I am working on. I am making a bead embroidered stole from random fabric, and now I want to give the thing a weighted head. It must also have padded little feet. What could I do for a tail? *wanders off to think* Miniature leather flogger? or just long long fringe?

Yes, well, thanks to you I've got possibly Aztecan possibly were-panther/jaguar tribal people running around in my dreams with glowing blue jaguar marks choosing Shamans with some sort of floating deific light or something.

...Not that I'm really complaining, I love the idea and the main character who isn't the shaman could be fun if I could pin him down long enough to get his name and purpose out of him... Shaman's name is Alu at present, I got that much at least. Maybe I should complain, this means more research on top of what I should already be doing for my other three in progress stories... >_>

And I'm glad I think I can fairly trust you other readers to not run away with my were-jaguar/panther tribe. lol <3 Also, I hate the days you just want to create and get nothing but The Look from your brain. That and the bruises are problematic the next day.

Oh, dear godlings. I do so recognize this one. This is why I (and you, and anyone sensible) has more than one artistic outlet. It's amazing how many story problems get solved at the sewing machine...