UrsulaV (ursulav) wrote,
UrsulaV
ursulav

Tour Day 2 & 3

300 kids in a cafeteria make a lot of noise. Ate at something in Austin called "Torchy's." Very tasty. Place in the hotel here in Decatur sells Pork Belly Buns. They are amazing.

Austin is full of giant agaves. Decatur is full of trees that are dropping--apricots, maybe? Orange fruit of some kind.

Best question from kid today was a very serious young man who asked "Did someone mind-control those monkeys? Their eyes were blue. That's mind-control, right?" There are no monkeys in any of our books.

Our driver today is named Harry and he used to be a Coke spy. This is a thing. They send out people to order Coke at restaurants where there have been complaints. They then surreptitiously take samples, returning three or four times, asking different waitstaff, ordering Coke or Coca-Cola, to see if there is a difference. Samples are sent to headquarters. If it is determined that they are selling a non-Coke product as Coke, they are sent a cease-and-desist for trademark infringement. Worst offender: Howard Johnson's.

And the people in the hotel room next to me just started having loud sex, so it's time to go to the bar.

ETA: I feel I must address the saga of the couple next door, because...well.

They were making some extraordinary noises, at about 4:30ish in the afternoon, and I eventually gave up and went down to the front desk, where I had a great conversation with a woman I will call Yolanda (not her real name but not too far off, who was a hero.) I will also remind my readers that I am in Georgia so all colloquialisms are reported as they happened.

ME: Hi! We are about to have a very awkward conversation!

YOLANDA OF THE HOTEL: We are?

ME: Are you ready?

HOTEL: I'm ready!

ME: Are you braced?

HOTEL: Let's do this!

ME: The couple in the room next to me is having incredibly loud sex.

HOTEL: Oh sweet baby Jesus.

ME: I admire their enthusiasm! I am glad they have found each other!

HOTEL: *tries not to laugh*

ME: They are clearly having a VERY fulfilling relationship!

HOTEL: *choking noises*

ME: But if you are at the stage of your relationship where you are making that kind of noise in the afternoon, you are gonna make it all night as well.

HOTEL: Oh yeah! *loses battle, begins laughing*

ME: I am a children's book author--

HOTEL: *begins slapping her hands on the desk*

ME: --and I gotta get up at 6:45 to go talk to third graders. Is there any way you can move me to a different room?

HOTEL: Oh thank the lord. I though you were gonna ask me to go pound on their door.

ME: That seemed unkind. For you and them.

HOTEL: I'll move you right over. (Shuffling of room numbers occurs)

ME: You heard that one before?

HOTEL: Oh honey, I've worked hotels for fifteen years. I've heard pretty much everything.

Yolanda, you were marvelous and if I can find a suggestion box, I will tell your supervisor so. My new room is lovely.
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