I'm sure there are other people on earth who, when they are at their wit's end, call their moms and say "Mooooommmmm! How do I paint penises?!" but I don't know any offhand. Fortunately, my Mom is a font of useful suggestions for capturing the wily wang in paint, and I am now back on track. And that probably says way more about the oddity of my life than anybody really needs to know.