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Hello, Rock Bottom.

The nice thing about hitting rock bottom, I gotta say, is that you genuinely learn who your friends are. Who's gonna save you, and who isn't. I have an astonishing number of friends. You hear yourself whining, and you can't stop, and you despise yourself for it, and they just keep listening. I first realized this during my divorce, of course, but I wasn't as far down, so it wasn't quite such an astonishing display of caring. They keep calling me and IMing me, and you guys have, of course, been very kind, despite the fact that I stopped being funny a couple of days ago and am now a sniveling wreck.  I feel loved.

The not-so-nice thing about hitting rock bottom is that glum realization that you have never been that good a friend to anyone, you never called anybody three times a day to see if they were okay, you didn't exactly shirk from uncontrollable weeping, but you sure didn't court it, and in short, that if you were your friends, you'd be totally boned.

Fortunately in life, as Granny Weatherwax would say, sometimes we get things we don't deserve.

I promise now, O blog of my confessions, that when this is over, when I finally crawl out of this dark hole...I'll be a better friend when my own friends sink into despair, and I will offer them couches and chocolate and take them out to coffee and IM them constantly. 

I promise.

You are a good friend to your friends or they wouldn't be so good to you. "Charity" friendships that endure rockbottom are pretty rare, so you must have real friends and they must love the kind of friend you are. Don't worry, they love you as you are, even if right now you are having a hard time remembering why.Hang in there and wait for the internal storm to blow past.

Oh and Granny Weatherwax rocks, but you knew that.

hmm. round here, Rock Bottom is a brewery. WHile I am not necessarily advocating alchoholism as therapy, well...it's always worked for me!

I agree that there's nothing like a crisis to teach you who your friends are, and man, i learned that last year, with surprising results. it's humbling, isn't it? i hope someday I can be as good a friend as my friends are.

Hang in there.

It's a good thing Granny Weatherwax is right. :D
Good quote, btw.

I read your less then happy posts with trepidation because you do write SO well and your situation is very similar to my own.
Just so you know, you're getting good thoughts sent your way.

Being deep in the heart of rock bottom right now too (and still looking for a way to drag me and my family out of it), I can completely understand, sympathize, and empathize with these sentiments. I don't have much in the way of computer time - except when my exceedingly crotchety and finicky father is not home, which thankfully he isn't right now - so I haven't been able to comment much on your entries lately.

I DO hope you can start seeing the light at the top of the hole and that either you can find the escape ladder/rope/magical pogo stick for yourself, or someone can toss you one so you can get out of your rock bottom hole. *hugs* You are in my thoughts, even if my thoughts are all jumbled together like a hodge podge of craft materials shoved in a box in storage for who knows how long (like all of mine are).

(And if this rambling comment makes ANY sense to you...congratulations. I haven't slept very well for more than two weeks - and I have three kids under the age of 4 - so my mental capabilities are beyond redemption at this point.)

Lots of people clearly think you are very special.
Enjoy the week of tourist-play! And sleep in between excursions/adventures, if you can--it doesn't seem as if you've had much of that in the last 2 months.
You really don't have to stay, and you don't have to leave -- and you can change your mind either way.
From the perspective of 5+ decades of valleys, chasms, and peaks, it really is going to be all right.

hugs from a lurker.

"In the depths of winter, I finally learned that there was in me an invincible summer." -- Albert Camus

I am convinced you also have an invincible summer.

You don't have to be funny for us. You are not required to answer us; most of us you couldn't recognize on the street anyway, so no worries. You're on the receiving end of the good energy this time, please accept it. We know you'll pass it on when you can, that's why we're sending it now.

Please take some vitamins and minerals. If you're too hot, and who isn't this horrible weekend, soak in a cold tub. This weekend is hell, and not just for you although yours is a much more extreme version than ours, we're just on the edges, you seem to be at ground zero. I hope you can find a way to relax, rest, and take someone's advise about HALT. You may well have to go, but please, NOT in high summer, in hurricane season, through Texas by yourself!

We're proud to stand with you, even we who haven't met you.

I haven't been here for my health, after all, or even the funny things.

We all got bad spots, and it's a good thing for us to come help.

I wish I could offer more than just e-hugs and cliches, and the hope that things turn back around for you.

::huggles and snugglebunny::

Was that too cutesy?

::lobs catmacros in your direction::

I've got more.

You talk as if it's some kind of burden to care, that your friends make a conscious decision to put themselves out. While I can't speak for everyone, when a good friend of mine is in trouble, it never even occurs to me as "optional" to do everything possible to bring them back around. I dropped everything and used all available skymiles to fly up and visit a friend five days before Christmas because she needed me. It wasn't an inconvenience, it was what needed to be done. It's what you do for those you love. :)

and in short, that if you were your friends, you'd be totally boned.

Actually, you are still funny. :)

It's definitely a thing. I dunno, it's like a personality trait. Some people see that you are down, and they go to you, and they are like, I want to help in any way I can, and to say I've noticed, and I'll listen, and I'll help.

Me, I'm like...huh...that person seems sad. Awkward. Avoid! Avoid! I never know what to say! I've never been there before.

My roommate just broke up with her boyfriend, and so she talked to me about it, and I've barely ever had a boyfriend, but it was okay, it wasn't hard, she did most of the talking, I just nodded.

You don't know me, but I went through a long bout of depression last Winter and your art, your writing, and a healthy supply of Terry Pratchett were the best reminders I had that there were still good things in life. They kept me sane. It's hard to stay depressed while you've got Digger or a Nallwug or a Battle Hamster in front of you.

Even if you're not helping someone personally, you still write and paint and put the results online. That can be a huge help to anyone who has time to look at them. It certainly was to me.

Thank you.