Leapt to my feet, snatched my bathrobe off the hook, and shrugged into it while running for the door.
Now, my bathrobe is large and grey and very very soft. It is warm and exceedingly comfy, and to replace it would require shelling out a fair amount of cash, since this is no cheap terrycloth concoction. This is a bathrobe par excellance! This is why I continue to keep it around, despite the fact that the belt vanished some time ago, and thus the wearer must either A) hold it closed, B) tie one of the ties to the little belt loop to make a haphazard closing, or C) keep the blinds closed.
Owing to time constraints, I was using option A as I opened the door to the UPS guy, and reached out for the package and the stylus.
And Ben, having tasted freedom t'other day, shot out the door and into the yard.
Now there is a dilemma. Capture of an 18lb cat requires two hands. Bathrobe requires at least one hand. UPS guy standing right there. Choice must be made between cat and modesty.
As my readers are doubtless aware, that was no choice at all.
I dove for Ben, caught him--he slowed down briefly, confronted with the madness of the outside world--and scooped him up, cursing. He hung like a miffed sandbag as I stalked back to the door and flung him inside, gathered up bathrobe and dignity, and turned back to sign for my package.
And that is how I started my Monday by flashing the UPS guy.