And then I thought "Wait just a damn minute. I'm thirty years old. I graduated from college a decade ago."
It lost a certain amount of angst after that, so apparently my brain got pissed and had to pull out all the stops, and have a friend call me because there was a rattlesnake in the house, and I didn't know where she lived, and I kept misdialing 911, and then I lost my car in the parking lot and then she called to say the snake had bitten her, and she was paralyzed, but not to worry, she'd manage somehow. "I'll be right there, really! Can you mapquest the directions?" I asked, fending off the rapist who had chosen that moment to assault me. "I'll have my general assistance dog do it..." she said, and then I was distracted by a salesman who was selling pet rocks with little name-tags that read "More Rational Than Thou."
It was probably for the best that my mother came to wake me up at that point.
One of the best things about Effexor is that pretty much all the cigars are just cigars.